The Marriage of a Virgin to a Non-virgin
Ideally a Christian virgin should marry another believer of the same background. But while some have the privilege of growing up in Christian homes, accepting the Lord at an early age and remaining virgins before marriage, others don’t have this privilege and do accept the Lord later in life after living in the world and practicing its sinful ways.
Believes should deal with the newly converts as God deals with them. The Bible teaches that “For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone should boast” (Ephesians 2:8-9, NKJV). Once the Lord deletes the past record of sin, it is deleted for life provided that the sinner never leaves the Lord.
The Bible teaches, “As far as the east is from the west, so far has He removed our transgressions from us” (Psalm 103:12). The prophet says, “You will cast all [a]our sins into the depths of the sea” (Micah 7:19, NKJV). Thus, Through the merits of the grace of Christ, the sinner’s past sins may be perfectly forgiven. And if the forgiven sinner endures till the end, he will have eternal life.
So, if God can forgive the sinner, should Christians not forgive them? Jesus said, “For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses” (Matthew 6:14-15, NKJV). In order to be right with God, we need to be right with our fellow men (1 John 4:20; Matthew 7:12).
Prayer and Wisdom for Challenges
The Christian virgin that contemplates a union with a Christian non-virgin should be prepared to face some challenges that come with such union. In this case, much should be done as a way to equip the partners with tools to deal with some issues that are related with the past. The Bible gives much advise on how love works:
“Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things” (1 Corinthians 13:4-7, NKJV).
Love bears long with the faults, failings, and weaknesses of others. It understands that all human beings are fallible, and that, therefore, due allowance must be made for the weaknesses that result from man’s inherently sinful nature. Long-suffering is opposed to haste, to strong reactions and words, and to irritability.
Long suffering means a state of mind that allows a man to be patiently quiet and to bear long when mistreated (Ephesians 4:2; 2 Timothy 4:2; 2 Peter 3:15; Matthew 26:63; 27:12, 14). He who is long-suffering possesses one of the fruits of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22). Love is the opposite of hatred, which reveals itself in harshness, anger, harshness, unkindness, and revenge. A person who really loves another is kind to him, ready to do him good, kind and courteous, because he does not wish to hurt him, but seeks his happiness (1 Peter 3:8).
Thus, there is a need for a Christian virgin who is contemplating union in marriage with a non-virgin Christian to prayerfully consider his decision of commitment. And the Lord will help the wisdom seeker for He promised, “I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will guide you with My eye” (Psalm 32:8, NKJV also James 1:5). The Lord is faithful to His promises.
In His service,
BibleAsk Team