What’s the difference between a husband being sacrificial and a wife submitting to his leadership?

Author: BibleAsk Team

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Speaker 1

Says hey Jay, what’s the difference between a husband being sacrificial servant and a wife submitting to her spouse’s leadership? Does sacrificial and submission mean the same.

Speaker 2

Thing in the Bible context?

Speaker 3

So great. Robert, I think yeah you are referred to some prior answers we give in and this traces back to this concept. Know, Paul says that really we all should be submitting to one another in any sort of relationship context but I’d say probably especially in the husband wife relationship. So I say even men should submit in some ways. But when it comes to what’s the difference between sacrifice and submitting there actually could be a lot of overlap because really submitting does involve sacrifice. It means sacrificing at times your plans, your will, your desires, yourself. And I’m not saying we should get a point where we completely 100% deny ourself in favor of another person because when we get a point where we just lose our own self identity, we lose what makes us unique, we lose our voice, we lose our conscience, these sorts of things. We have now entered a very dark dangerous space that God doesn’t want us to be in. God really wants us to be in kind of like a co equal relationship where we all contribute to each other. And again this could be outside a marriage relationship or it could be even more so within where each are lifting up one another.

Speaker 3

And I do believe the man is held to the higher standard of love. I mean both should love but the man is called to love in the image of Christ. And maybe I can quickly pull up that verse. Ephesians ephesians five husbands love. Ephesians 525 husbands love your wives. Even as Christ also loved the church and gave himself for it. This is the highest standard of love, period. And so God sets a high bar. He knows we’re not going to meet it often but by his Spirit we can. And we are to as part of this love be very sacrificing. Our love should be for the wife. We should want her to be happy, her needs should be met even to the point where maybe at times it hurts and that’s then where sacrifice comes in and submitting your will then to your spouse. So I hope that makes more sense of these ideas of sacrifice versus submission.

Speaker 2

And the important thing there too also is that when the husband does truly love the wife and put her needs as a priority before his own it becomes very easy for her to submit to him because her needs are taken care of. And so now that submission is coming out of love and respect as opposed to fear and intimidation and submitting for a woman to submit out of fear is not love, it’s not respect. It’s not the dynamic that God wants there to be between a husband and a wife. He wants the wife to be submitting out of respect, which she can naturally and easily do when she is truly loved.

Speaker 3

Yeah, there’s this aspect of voluntary giving and a giving that should feel rewarding because you know you’re safe to give and the other will give back and has your back. Unfortunately, in this world, we often have unilateral relationships or someone who’s going to be like a parasite or take advantage. So we have to tend to have our guard up more. But when you can find that right person that you could wholly trust, that you could totally hand your heart over to them and know it’s safe there now you know that you’re probably in a good relationship.

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