Is it possible to revive the marital love relationship after one has committed adultery?

Hello B,

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While adultery is the most painful attack on the love relationship between a man and a woman, regaining confidence and love is possible. There are some basic guidelines to help heal a broken relationship:

The most important factor to healing a couple’s relationship is regaining their relationship with God “Look unto me, and be ye saved” (Isaiah 45:22). As the couple draw close to God, He will heal and mend their hearts “he [God] hath sent me to heal the brokenhearted” (Luke 4:18).

The second step is, the betrayer has to have complete separation from the person with whom he/she committed adultery. “And Jesus said unto her, neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more” (John 8:11). The betrayed persons needs to see that a serious step has been taken by the betrayer towards fixing the marriage.

And then, the betrayer needs to allow for some time where the betrayed person regains confidence. And this “healing time” should not be used for judgements “For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” (Romans 3: 23). There should be no place for resentment and hate “Charity suffereth long, and is kind” (1 Corinthians 13:4). Paul gives a great advice on forgetting the past “but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before” (Philippians 3:13).

Then, the couple should work into a constructive study to analyze and determine why the unfaithfulness took place and to regain their first love (Revelation 2:4). With wise Christian counsel, they may work on mending those weak areas in their personality “Remember therefore from whence thou art fallen, and repent, and do the first works” (Revelation 2:5).

With God’s healing Spirit, this fall can be an opportunity to learn and start a new relationship. The couple can learn not only to forgive (Ephesians 4:22), but to rekindle their love in a new way. They can ask the Lord,  “Restore unto me the joy of thy salvation” (Psalms 52:12). And the Lord has promised to make things anew “Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new” (2 Corinthians 5:17).

In His service,

BibleAsk Team

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